Hastily written, apologies but it's a good story nonetheless.
The story actually starts with Jack Osbourne and his Adrenaline Junkie TV show. My wife and I were watching it one evening and after one particular crazy stunt I happened to mention the words "I wish I could do that".
In time I learnt there's a huge difference in what I say and what someone understood and on Christmas morning that year I opened a surprise present, the triple whammy at Magna. The triple whammy involves a zipline, a 150ft abseil and to top of the day a walk off a 150ft platform holding a rope, plummeting to the ground until a powerfan slows the descent to a stop. To be clear, I did not WISH I could have the opportunity to do that, I just wished that I had whatever it took to enjoy these sort of things - turns out with wishes you have to be very precise!!
It only took me 7 months to book it. I'd put it away hoping it would be forgotten but no, the reminders came weekly, daily, then hourly until I finally gave in and booked the experience for September.
It's amazing how time flies when you're really not looking forward to something but here we were at Magna on a lovely September morning. I'd been awake since 3AM. I felt sick, I was absolutely petrified and would have given anything to do a runner, but I couldn't, here we go!
There were three of us there for the experience, we had the safety briefing and proceeded to experience number one, the zip line. I'd love to say I charged in to be first but no, when it came to volunteering to who goes first I hid well behind the others. The zipline wasn't that bad to be honest, I was strapped in and don't remember a lot of it apart from spinning around a lot.
Next the abseil. This was the first part where I had climb up to the platform used by abseilers, powerfanners and bungee jumpers (which thankfully I wasn't doing). I remember climbing flight after flight of metal steps which was really difficult when you're shaking like a leaf. I got to what I thought was the platform but was greeted by a sign saying "YOU'RE HALFWAY THERE". What made matter worse for me was a person being brought down from the platform, they couldn't go any further and were being accompanied back. I froze, seriously, I couldn't move at all.
I wish I had some advice of how I decided to go further but I have no idea. There was no moment of inspiration or injection of courage I just sort of thought I had no choice really, my wife and 2 kids were here supporting me and I wouldn't have heard the end of it had I done a runner!! Arriving at the top platform I did what everyone tells you not to, I looked down. I think it was only because I had an empty stomach that prevented me from throwing up over the side. I couldn't make out anyone on the ground, I was dizzy and could only hear the rather horrific screams of people jumping off - who for some bizarre reason were having the time of their lives.
The abseil person spotted me and called me over. They hooked up the ropes and told me the descent would be very slow and controlled. They told me nothing can go wrong and just enjoy it. Enjoy it? Pfft. As I was being lowered off the platform I lost control of my vocal chords (at least it wasn't my bowels), I was almost crying as I was suspended in mid air, with a lot of nothing but air underneath me making a rather audible whimper.
I reckon it took at least four hours to get down, that's how it felt anyway. I adopted a similar motion to rapidly milking a cow to literally inch down the rope tiny bit by tiny bit. I eventually got to the ground and was greeted by some staff asking me if I enjoyed it, no was the honest response. I didn't enjoy it one bit, hated it, there was no rush of excitement, I just wanted to be sick.
After the abseil I bumped into one of my group of three. They'd had to do the abseil in tandem with one of the helpers, they weren't doing the powerfan, they'd enough! Can't say I blamed them at all! The powerfan involved the same walk up to the platform, it wasn't any easier or any faster and if anything it seemed way higher than last time.
The powerfan platform was shared with the bungee jumpers. I walked over trying my best not to look down, I still did. Funnily enough my vision had now resembled a bungee, the ground sort of moving up and down, perhaps it was the nausea. Anyway, I got rigged up in my safety gear. The instructor spent an age telling me what was the plan, basically he was going to open a gate, I was going to hold on to a piece of a string and simply walk off making sure I look forwards at all times because if I look down I'll spin a little.
Just before we were opening the gate a call came over the radio, a bungee jumper had to go before me so I had the luxury of trying to remain calm for a few extra minutes. I watched the bungee jumper shaking my head. By now all my nerves had gone, I was shaking but I couldn't feel it, I was sweating and my stomach hurt really bad. It was time.
The gate was open, on the count of three I was to walk. 1...2...3...GOOOOOOOOOOOO
I was stood there. Slightly hunched over and bent at the knees, frozen. I told the instructor I couldn't do it. Every part of my body wouldn't move. I'm so sorry I said, I literally can't move. The instructor reminded me to breathe (fair point) and told me how I'd got this far and if I didn't do it I'd seriously regret it. Despite me thinking quite the contrary he said he'd been there himself and seen it many times.
I asked him for a favour. If he got to 3 on the next count could he push me off. I said if he gets to 3 and I haven't moved I won't do it and I'm happy for a nudge. He laughed, said sure and told me to get ready.
1....
That's all I heard and I went.
Seriously, I don't know how but I did it. I also have no idea what sound came out of me at that very point. It wasn't a roar of triumph, a scream of excitement or anything particularly inspiring. It was more like a very loud retch than anything else but hey, I don't think many people noticed.
I can't remember much else, I could hear the powerfan on the short journey down, I also ignored all instructions and looked down at the floor rapidly heading towards me and when I reached the bottom was almost horizontal. The instructors came over and I was buzzing. Seriously, it's the first time I'd experienced an adrealine rush. It was amazing but also knowing that I never had to do that again was very much at the front of my thoughts.
So that was it. I got a t-shirt and I'd love to say it cured my fear of heights but the week after at Alton Towers I was still limited to the Cyril the Squirrel ride and more than happy with that. I still don't do ladders. I conquered something however briefly and lived to tell tale but I think more than anything else I learnt to make sure people understand what I mean at all times!
There is a second part to this story, it's different and goes into a difficult time in my life but equally I hope can raise awareness and offers a bit of support and encouragement, you can read it here.
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